03 March 2013

我家人各分東西..父母为我们建立的家。不能滅的!

image download from Can stock.com

今天很難受‧但又要學放下!
I was once told that when my father die, family will slowly disconnect, each and individual will be heading their own path and will not be as close when father is alive. Ever since mom die, father is the key of family connection. I never pay attention to it and very oftented by the comment.

Father gone since June of last year( 2012) I started to noticed the family relationship is slowly breaking up, sibling is not keeping in touch and don't want to keep in touch. I tried hard to keep active in their lives, but were labeled as busy-body, leave them alone, this has discourage me to stay positive.

I too going through life changed, after father passing, I still mad at myself for not being a good daughter, didn't give my best while he is alive, I lost the chances and I am regret and now heading to Menopause, another cycle of health, mind and body changes...
so, I am sad, sad that I remembered this were never happened to my mom family, my dad were adopted child, his family were not as close as mother family, it seem my mom family were Never apart when Grandmother die, mom were the key of her sibling connector, she was active with her sisters, when he oldest sister pass away, she still stay close in touch with her nieces and nephew..

Is it the evolution of time? and good value is fading as new generation arise?.. I cant bear,.. My buddy were comforting me and ask me to learn to let go, let them come to me when they realize, let them take the time, I need to live and move on , I should learn to live in peace, I still have my boy and husband to look after, I should move on and live a peaceful live.

My Oldest sister's also another sentimental person that like me..I know she feels the same way like I do, but my parent have 6 kids..........

I am a very emotional and sentimental person, I remembered very well when I was a child, I like to cry in bed or on the sofa when I am alone at home, is it because fear of dark.. no no, I am fear any of my family members get hurt or die, someone cant make it home.. I pray Pray Pray so hard and when everyone safe and home, I am so cheerful and happy, I know I was 8 then.

I wish mom and dad wish watch over us, its just a coping time of lost, Or some of us still coping with our dearest father loses.. but one of my sister is spending lots of time with a Monk, perhaps, she is interested the love of Buddha, and being a faithful follower, Buddhist will be no family connection. .

老斗媽,如果您哋聽見,帮下我同阿大姐呼喚兄弟姊親情永在,堅固的聯系兄弟姐妹親情、大家互相互愛,不是有機心去愛,像以前大家细個果陣子的親愛!
mom, dad, if you can heard me, are you able to keep us connected?
我知人大了,只是被環境所逼不得已不得已,再加大家为自己的家同將來生活安定而忙‧漸渐的忽略兄弟姊妹的親情的存在,但是我们别忘了親情的value呀、因为自己也有兒女、也不想下一代沒有了親情的價值觀!就算是單身,沒兒沒女,也沒理由說一旦父母去世,血缘绝的,因为每一个人需要有一个家的時候,而這个是我们父母为我们建立的家。不能滅的,所以要靠大家那颗家的心去維持下去直到next revolution, or next generation build their own.

 I hope mom and dad can help the family chain and value link strong again,  I like to hope and believe family love will never die..



this illustration downloaded from:http://www.zcool.com.cn/work/ZOTU2NzQ4.html

2 comments:

墮天使祥 said...

我可以明白妳的感受,因爲我也面對過同樣的問題。

友情、親情,我都很想、很努力去維持。

可惜這些關係都牽涉最少另外一個人,如果對方沒有那個心,無論我們如何努力,都沒有辦法的。

於是我選擇了放手,畢竟每一個人都有自己的一條路要去走。我也有自己的一條路,總不能爲了他們而傷心。

希望妳能早日找到妳的出口。

MayY . C 五月媽媽 said...

阿馮,謝謝你!

我想我这人很婆媽,我可能永远也放不下家人,因為我爸我媽也很念情的人、我有他们的DNA很深。

我盼我兄姐是暂時的各走各路是因為對爸的离世放不下,正在找方向去克服痛失最親或釋放–下吧!
我信总有一天我们会再聚更加珍惜親情。
我只盼我们一家人能再拍一張合冢照、那我就滿足了!

祝你也会令家人明白親情永在,比此珍措!
大家努力去堅特和祈禱哦!